Hard Wired To Feel Emtional Pain: The Reality of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

Hard Wired To Feel Emtional Pain: The Reality of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

ADHD in Layman’s Terms

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a mental health condition in which someone has difficulty paying attention, controlling impulsive behaviors and exhibiting hyperactivity. This condition is most commonly diagnosed in children, however, can, and often does, last into adulthood. Understanding ADHD, and finding effective ways to manage symptoms, or alleviate them altogether, is essential for individuals to live a successful and satisfying life.

ADHD is characterized by three different types of behaviors: inattention, impulsivity and hyperactivity. Those with attention deficits may exhibit poor focus or concentration, trouble paying attention to details and following directions or difficulty completing school or work assignments. People who experience impulsivity may be quick to blurt out answers, interrupt or act without thinking about the consequences. Finally, those who are hyperactive may talk excessively and energetically, fidget or squirm or find it hard to sit still for long periods.

Common symptoms include difficulty paying attention, restlessness, impulsiveness, procrastination, difficulty following instructions, knowledge retention issues, disorganization, daydreaming, difficulty sustaining focus, being easily distracted and difficulty managing time.

It’s highly individualized

Due to the different possible manifestations of ADHD, treatment is highly individualized and can vary. Generally, the first line of treatment includes medication and/or behavioral approaches. Medications are typically used to improve concentration and focus while helping to reduce impulsivity and hyperactivity. Depending on the individual, the doctor may prescribe one or more medicines such as Adderall, Ritalin or Concerta. Behavioral approaches may include cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or psychotherapy in order to help understand and manage their behavior.

In addition to conventional approaches to managing ADHD, there are several natural remedies that may be relied upon in conjunction with medications. Exercising regularly, sleeping enough, eating a healthy and balanced diet and practicing mindfulness can all help to support the individual in dealing with some of the symptoms of ADHD. Spending time in nature, talking with friends, doing something creative and avoiding stimulants like caffeine may also provide some relief. Ultimately, it is important for those with ADHD to find what works best for them, in order to improve their overall life satisfaction.

First and foremost

Of course it goes without saying, but I will say it anyway, always enlist your personal health care provider when concerned with any personal health care issues. ADHD should always first be diagnosed by your doctor and a treatment plan should always be between the two of you. Open communication with your physician will be the first right move in the right direction.

The next best move is to invest in your own wisdom. No one knows you better than you and quite frankly you are about to discover that you probably don’t know you all that well either. So start educating yourself. Start slow but definitely start figuring out which of these symptoms are unique to you. The trick is to begin dissecting the where, when and how’s each of the symptoms relates to you personally.

Immeditately read Brain Energy and look up the author. This doctor has a whole differant approach to mental illness. He strongly believes that these ‘mental problems’ come from a completely differant place. He believes they stem from poor metobolic health. This is a must read for anyone with ADHD, Bipolar Disorder and/or Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.

ADHD in Layman’s Terms
A Few Favorites To Get You Started

get the facts

Once diagnosed, it’s important to get the facts on ADHD. And trust me, they are everywhere. So much so that it can become overwhelming. Namely for someone with ADHD. But it is important to know exactly what you are dealing with. Knowledge is power and you want all the power you can get. In time, you will become the expert on your ADHD.

Learning about your ADHD is an essential step in managing it. (I keep saying YOUR ADHD, because every case is unique. No two people with the disorder act or react in the exact same way.) So it’s important to become as informed as possible about ADHD and the various treatments available for it. Then determine which pieces and parts work uniquely for you.
Here are a few tips for learning about your ADHD:

1. Read books and articles on ADHD. It’s important to read works written by mental health professionals and the most recent to come to print. Medicine is an ever evolving field and everyday new ideas, therories and treatments come to light. So staying up with the latest research on the subject is paramount. I display books, posts and research throughout this site. When I learn it, you learn it.

2. Speak to other adults who have ADHD and learn from their experiences. Real life is always best and learning what others do to help themselves can never hurt. Also, having someone who actually understands what you are going through can be golden. Try finding an ADHD support group in your area. It can be extremely beneficial for managing symptoms. Being part of a supportive group can help to diminish lonely feelings and provide a space to talk about your struggles and triumphs with those who truly understand.
There are a few things to consider when finding a suitable ADHD support group:
  • Find a group with members of a similar age or having similar interests. This can be helpful in connecting and forming meaningful relationships.
  • Look for groups that incorporate activities such as exercises or games to help with focus and concentration.
  • Think about location. Look for a group that meets at a convenient location or time.
  • Look for groups with certified practitioners or professionals. This can help to provide guidance and advice. One with a holistic approach would be best, in my opinion.
Once you have found a suitable ADHD support group, it is important to take part and engage in the activities. Talking to fellow members and sharing tips and advice can be a great way to build relationships and find ADHD relief.
3. Learn about how you can make cognitive-behavioral changes to manage your symptoms. Changing your ways (while explaining to no one – we will discuss that throughout this site) is life long. Managing ADHD is the goal. To date, there is no CURE for ADHD, so owning it and controlling your symptoms is the path to take.
4. Research medications used to treat ADHD and the potential side effects. This is extremely important. If the cure is worse than the disease, you really want to know this first. Do your own due diligence and talk things out with your health care provider. Remember, knowledge is king. Here are a few common drugs used to treat adult ADHD that you can start with.
5. Learn about herbal and natural treatments that help with ADHD. It is said that for every created synthetic drug there is a naturally created counterpart. And I have first hand knowledge that says that might just be true. So, for example, if one of your symptoms is restlessness, then finding that herb, spice, tea or soup that calms you, will be exactly what the doctor ordered. (Check into saffron, an amazing spice that has a very calming effect and studies have shown it quite beneficial for those with ADHD.) If you discover that taking a meditative walk at the right time every day (the time you have figured out for yourself through learning to learn about you) will allow you to stay on an even keel, then invest in some walking shoes and get moving. And remember, you don’t have to explain anything to a soul. This is about your self care and what works to make you the best you are. So if explaining yourself is a problem, then get passed it or you will go no where real fast.
6. Learn about nutrition and dietary changes that will help. You will be amazed at how what you consume (or don’t) effects your brain so definately get a food journal (here’s the one I likeand start tracking what you eat and drink. This entire site concentrates heavily on what we consume, or don’t eat, that we should. The important thing is to learn about the foods you consume and recognize how your body and brain react to them.
7. And last, but certainly not least, look into the suppliments that might just make all the differance in the world for you. Start with magnesium and vitamine D3. Understand the crucial role these essential nutrients play in managing ADHD symptoms. In particular, these two key nutrients, Vitamin D and Magnesium, that have gained a lot of attention for their potential benefits in supporting individuals with ADHD. Speak with you doctor about testing for magnesium and vitamin D deficiencies. (Throw in a test for zinc too. Just for good measure. ) It’s as easy as a blood or urine sample.

Sounds so easy

I do realize how easy all of that sounds, but I also understand just how hard it can actually be. So start small and just walk through the process at your own pace. As you do, things will simply start changing in your favor. The more you know about yourself and your symptoms and the way you act or react to them will only improve over time. And that is an important fact to remember. This is a life long journey. ADHD is a part of you so take the steps necessary to live your best life. But also, and foremost, remember this small part of you does not define you or your capabilities to reach your dreams and aspirations.

The latest studies

Keeping up with the latest and greatest on the subject of ADHD is very important. When I began researching the topic, I realized that the sheer volume of data was overwhelming. But I also knew that inside that data (somewhere) was the answers to the questions that all people with ADHD need to know. Some of it was very scientific and so hard to read that comprehending it was mind boggling. And I have to admit, I quickly gave up. So, instead, I continued to search until I found the professionals I could understand and used them always as a cross reference.

Here are a few of my favorites, that I still follow on a daily. You can subscribe to many of them and their latest posts, finding and events will come straight to your email. So find the ones that work for you and start staying on top of the world you actually live in. The world of a woman with ADHD.

One of my favorites is Science Daily. Your source for the latest research news. Go to their home page and put ADHD in the search bar and off you go. You can read a plethora of data easily, comprehend it and remember it. It’s a website I have on speed dial (sorta speak).

Here’s a great post to get you started. It’s titled: Researchers link 27 genetic variants to ADHD

It’s a fastinating read and will definately get you started on your own due diligence and your search to find the researchers and professionals you can relate to and understand.

Also try CHADD. This site too is wonderful for readable, digestable data on ADHD. You can join this organization, get in depth guides and learn about myths and misunderstandings about this disorder. Check out this article titled: Women and Girls. Informative, readable and easy to understand. It will give you a view of how they deliver their data. It could be just what you need. 

And of course I am a constant reader of ADDitude magazine.

These are just a few sites that I follow. You too will find your favorites and learn to rely on their findings. So definately begin your research and start mastering this part of your life. It can only lead to better things to come.

And immeditately read Brain Energy and look up the author. This doctor has a whole differant approach to mental illness. He strongly believes that these ‘mental problems’ come from a completely differant place. He believes they stem from poor metobolic health. This is a must read for anyone with ADHD, Bipolar Disorder and/or Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Also, binge watch if you can, The Metabolic Link on you tube. You will also look at mental disorders in a whole new light.

Natural approaches in metabolic syndrome management

Herbal Medicines for Treating Metabolic Syndrome: A Systematic Review of Randomized Controlled Trials

So what should you do right now

First start with a promise to yourself. And that promise is to be patient with yourself. No matter how long you’ve been dealing with your ADHD, or have just been diagnosed, it’s important to remember to be compassionate with yourself. Self love and self care will soon be your closest companions. Remember you are not trying to change who you are, just tweek a very small part of the whole.

Secondly, get a journal and start learning to learn about you. If you have never journaled before, start simple. But we here at AlllNaturWell believe journaling is the right place to begin. Discovering who you truly are is a great aid in managing not only ADHD, but RSD and Bipolar Disorder as well. It’s a way to ‘take control’ of your situation and allows you to see certain patterns in your day to day that can be used (or un-used) when managing your mental health for the long haul.

I’ve listed a few suggestions below but Amazon has a great variety when it comes to journals, diaries and planners. Again, if you have never journaled, start with something that gives you prompts and reminders. And don’t make it chore. Have fun with it. You might just be the most interesting person you’ll have the pleasure of knowing. So go ahead. Let the self discovery begin.

ADHD in Layman’s Terms
A Few Favorites To Get You Started

A little off topic

While I have you here let me add a few hints about ‘thoughts’ journaling. First grab a journal that feels good in your hand. (Here’s the one I use) And by that I mean one you can get attached to. This journal will soon become your best friend and closest confidante. Somedays you will write like a best selling author. Other days you will doodle because you have nothing to say. And that’s okay. Just make sure you go to that book everyday for your good mental health. And trust me, you will soon know eactly why.

With that said, when I first started researching neurodevelopmental disorders, which is what we are talking about when addressing ADHD, I began keeping notes on all the information I was suddenly taking in. And that was okay, and necessary, but I also quickly learned that I had to know far more about my son-in-law. (Read my About page to understand the whole story.) I needed to know about his daily actions, his diet, his habits, his sleeping routine – of which he had none – and so many little idiosyncrasies I hadn’t realized even existed. Without this data on a daily, I was simply stabbing in the dark. So I ask him to start keeping a very detailed account of everyday for one month. This data proved priceless. Patterns began to reveal themselves and a road to understanding his symptoms began falling into place. Dim little lightbulbs started popping on. And all with very little effort on his part.

So for the first thirty days after being diagnosed, whether that be ADHD, RSD or Bipolar Disorder, it would be wise to start understanding your own habits – both good and not so good. Write down everything you consume in a day and the time you ate it. Detail any symptoms – when they are heightened or drop off. Pay close attention to your water consumption. Detail the amount of caffine you take in. Record what time you retire to bed and what time you wake. How tired were you when you went to bed. Did you fall fast asleep or was it a restless night. Did you rise in a good mood? Bad mood? Dragging or hopping right into the day? What did you eat for breakfast. Did you leave for work on time? You get the idea. Every move is relevant. Literally.

But just as important, maybe more important in fact, is writing down your ‘thoughts’ on the day.

With that said, I do believe, that for many of us anyway, spending time exploring who you truly are in your day to day, can only lead to a healthier body, an eased mind and a content spirit. A combination that each of us is looking for. Learning to journal, and taking the results seriously, is one of those necessary ‘small changes’ that need to be put into place for the whole self wellness.

Back on subject

Finally, let’s talk about the Bipolar brain. What exactly is going on in there?

Well, in individuals with bipolar disorder, there are distinct differences in brain functioning compared to those with a typical, non-bipolar brain. These differences can be observed through various neuroimaging techniques and shed light on the underlying neurological mechanisms of the disorder. Here are some key ways in which the brain of someone with bipolar disorder differs from a normal brain:

  1. Structural Differences: Neuroimaging studies have identified structural abnormalities in certain brain regions of individuals with bipolar disorder. These include alterations in the prefrontal cortex, amygdala, and hippocampus, which are involved in emotional regulation, mood processing, and memory formation. These structural changes may contribute to difficulties in emotion regulation and the mood disturbances observed in bipolar disorder.
  2. Functional Imbalances: Brain imaging studies have also revealed differences in the functional connectivity and activation patterns within the brains of individuals with bipolar disorder. These imbalances can affect various brain networks involved in emotional processing, cognitive control, and reward systems. The disruptions in these networks can contribute to the oscillation between manic and depressive episodes characteristic of bipolar disorder.
  3. Neurotransmitter Dysregulation: Bipolar disorder is associated with dysregulation of several neurotransmitters, including serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine. These neurotransmitters play a crucial role in regulating mood, emotions, and cognitive processes. The imbalance of these neurotransmitters can contribute to the extreme mood swings and disrupted emotional states experienced in bipolar disorder.
  4. Circadian Rhythm Disruptions: Bipolar disorder is often associated with disruptions in the circadian rhythm, the internal biological clock that regulates sleep-wake cycles and other physiological processes. Neuroimaging studies have shown alterations in brain regions involved in circadian rhythm regulation, such as the suprachiasmatic nucleus. These disruptions can contribute to sleep disturbances and disturbances in daily routines often observed in individuals with bipolar disorder.

It is important to note that these brain differences in bipolar disorder do not imply a “fault” or inherent abnormality. Instead, they reflect the complex interplay of genetic, environmental, and neurobiological factors that contribute to the development and progression of bipolar disorder. Further research is ongoing to deepen our understanding of these brain differences and their role in the onset, course, and treatment of bipolar disorder.

Here are a few articles that will throw some more light on this topic. They are short reads with a plethora of data.

Neurodevelopmental subtypes of bipolar disorder are related to cortical folding patterns: an international multicenter study

Uncovering neurodevelopmental features in bipolar affective disorder

Neurodevelopmental pathways in bipolar disorder

What’s a body to do

Now that we’ve covered Bipolar Disorder and the need for calulated sleep in layman’s terms, definately dive deeper on a daily basis. Make it part of who you are. Create the habit of reading one relevant article, study or email on the subject daily. Now that’s not to say they will all be relevant to you, but it will force the situation where you stay tuned into the subject. All it might take is one relatable story to reveal a secret that makes your life easier and more enjoyable. And what’s a few minutes spent everyday reading a few thousand words that could deliver a tip, trick or study that could add to the peace and joy in your life.

And write, write, write. Get a journal and start your story today. I am not kidding when I say you are probably a stranger to yourself and have been most of your life. You took on what others may have said about you, knowing full well their words were wrong but not knowing how to explain they were. And so you just let it ride and somehow became (and accepted) what those words represented. Over time, and hearing these words often enough, makes one buy into the line and believing such brings on the new problem of low self esteem, shame and embarrassment. It’s only after a accurate diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder that everything comes into focus. By that time however, much of the damage has been done and is often difficult to unlearn. But journaling is your key to freedom.

And last be not least, experiment with your own sleep hygiene. By that I mean, try making a few small changes in your sleep routine and see what happens. Write your journal, read your journal and implement the obvious changes that need to be made. Navigate through your journey, don’t let the waves just move you along.

And before we go any further, you must give everything a fair fighting chance to work. Four days to see if a suppliment has any effect on you is not a fair shot. Changes take time to cause results. Like a long time. Remember you have been Bipolar most of your life. So adding a suppliment – which I promote heavily at times – will take a bit of time to take hold. So, when you decide to add (or subtract) something to or from your life, make a vow to follow through for 365 days before deciding to retain or abort the action.

Anyway, as I was saying, experiment a bit. Let’s say you have a terrible habit of getting into bed and immediately grabbing the phone and start scrolling TicTok. Now don’t get me wrong, I love TicTok too, but there is nothing on there that can’t wait until you’ve allowed your body to rest and rejuvinate itself. Afterall, you now know all the important things that take place when you sleep. Instead learn to ‘retire from your day‘, create a plan, work your plan and get the most out of your sleep.

The bottom line is that now that you know your situation, take control of it, master it and keep going. Women with ADHD, RSD and Bipolar Disorder have made great strides in their worlds and so can you. Learn to learn about you and the sky’s the limit.

Just A Personal Side Note: In all fairness, there’s is a whole lot more to getting a reign on your Bipolar Disorder. It takes a lot of research, soul searching and self discovery. And it takes a lot of adjusting and a whole lot of time and patience. My son-in-law was quite reluctant in the beginning but as I made suggestions, according to research I could show him, he did help himself by complying to my requests. I bought him a few suppliments I thought would help and my daughter started presenting differant meals to improve their diets and they created a bedtime ritual, that quite frankly benefitted both of them. I bought them a ‘thoughts’ journal and a ‘food’ journal and together they wrote his story. About 6 months into it, he himself realized just how much better he was feeling. His aches were lessening, he was actually sleeping 8 hours a day and he’d lost a conciderable amount of weight. His mind was not racing as much, his spirit was content and having a day filled with rewarding habits seemed to be the beginning of healing. Now although his diagnosis turned out to be way off the mental dysregulation path, did not seem to change things. He was already on the right path to being the happy, carefree young man he once was. A year later, still following the game plan they had created for themselves, their family is happy, healthy and thriving. All because he took control of his situation by educating himself and following through with life changes that absolutely made all the differance.

A little off subject again

While I was researching, I tripped across a few interesting recipes that used natural ingredients that have been proven to improve ADHD. My daughter used them and to this day they stay in her line up of cuisine.

Her favorite is Lion’s Main Crab Cakes. (The kids think it’s lobster!) And be warned, we will constantly refer to this mushroom throughout the site. Lion’s Mane is something you will want to become familiar with.

Anyway, I can’t remember where I found the recipe but knew that I wanted to get fresh Lion’s Mane into their diet. Finding the fresh Lion’s mane was a bit trying but soon it was like ordering anything else on line.

Here’s the recipe my daughter uses for this wonderful dish and here’s a few web sites that will explain facts and fiction on this fungi called Lion’s Mane.

In a large bowl combine:

1 egg
1 tablespoon mayonnaise
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
¾ teaspoon old bay seasoning
1 teaspoon dijon mustard
1 tablespoon finely chopped parsley
Salt and Pepper to taste
½ cup panko breadcrumbs
¼ cup finely chopped scallions or green onions
Shred 8-10 ounces of fresh Lion’s Mane Mushrooms to look like shredded crab meat might look. Gently fold into the egg mixture until completely incorporated.

Form mixture into crab cakes and cook in oil in a saute pan over medium/high heat for about 3 minutes on each side or until golden brown. Remove to a paper towel lined plate and serve warm with a remoulade sauce.

Remoulade Sauce:

In a bowl combine:

⅔ cup mayonnaise
1 tablespoon dijon mustard
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon lemon zest
1 teaspoon worcestshire sauce
1 tablespoon chopped chives
1/2 tablespoon finely chopped scallions or green onions
½ teaspoon smoked paprika
⅛ teaspoon cayenne pepper
Salt and Pepper to taste
Whole Foods sells Lion’s Mane Mushrooms as do many other grocers and health food stores. Do your research and make sure you are comfortable with what you are purchasing. And remember, adding any natural ingredient to your ADHD treatment plan should first be discussed with your primary care professional. Some people do have allergies to mushrooms so make sure you know whether you have this situation or not.

Read these three blogs that discuss Lion’s Main Mushrooms and ADHD.

ADDitude – The Truth About Lion’s Mane, Psychedelics & Caffeine

forij.co – Lion’s Mane vs. Adderall for ADHD

mytwentytwo.co.uk – Lion’s Mane And ADHD: Could This Wonder-Mushroom Offer An Alternative To ADHD Medication?

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